Many parents like sharing about their children’s lives online with close friends, but what happens when it starts to become a business? The dangers of sharenting and kidfluencing are very real and can have dangerous effects on a child’s emotional and physical well-being.
We recently sat down with Sarah Adams, also known as MomUncharted online, to talk about the dangers of sharenting. Sarah is a fierce advocate for children, and she’s on a mission to teach parents that their kids have a right to privacy, informed consent, and online safety. In this post, she answers some frequently asked questions about kids and social media and gives actionable advice for families looking to protect their kids’ online privacy.
1. How do you respond to critics who say "it’s just harmless content" or "but my kids love it"?
I think it's important for parents to understand that there are nefarious individuals online who are not looking at your children through the same lens and that even "harmless content" has the potential to be viewed very differently through sick eyes — or even turned into something very unwholesome through AI. On top of that, is sharing content violating our children's right to privacy, informed consent, and digital safety really harmless? I would argue otherwise.
I recognize that many kids love being in front of the camera, and they can still have that opportunity with those videos staying in your camera roll or being shared via text or email with close family members or friends. Children are just too young to fully understand what social media is — they can say "they love it" but they can't truly love it if they don't understand it.
2. What are some ways you teach your own kids about privacy, digital footprints, and social media?
My children are fairly young, so we haven't had to dive deep into conversations regarding digital footprints and social media at this point but we are always discussing privacy and consent. I regularly ask before I take a photo or video, "Can mom take a photo of you?" or "Can I record this moment?"
Oftentimes, the answer is no, and as hard as that can be on my mama heart, I want them to see me respecting their decision. I think it's important for them to learn that they own their image and that their consent isn't optional.
3. What would you say to someone who thinks you're being a little TOO cautious?
I would respond with "You are welcome to your opinion, but this is what works for our family." Frankly, after four years of discussing these topics, seeing the advancements in AI and the state of social media, parents should exercise an abundance of caution with the images and information they share about their children. It's scary out there. I’ve never met anyone who regretted sharing too little of their kids’ online lives.
4. Do you think it's possible to ethically involve children in any content creation?
I've never been against all sharing. From the beginning, I’ve always said there’s a difference between creators who use their children as content versus those who share glimpses of their children or family life. You can keep it private and share with trusted family members and friends while still being mindful of the images and information you share because nothing is truly private on social media.
My problem is with parents who center their content around their children — i.e., they would not be successful without regularly or solely featuring their children. But when it comes to the question “Is there an ethical way to involve children?” I would lean toward no.
5. What are three things a parent can do TODAY to help protect their kid's online privacy?
1. Audit your posts
Go through your social media and delete any posts that have your child’s full name, birth date, school, location, routines, medical information, and other personal identifying information. Also, delete photos that show them in a state of undress, bath time, potty training, and any other vulnerable or embarrassing moments.
2. Adjust your privacy settings
Take time to review your privacy settings across platforms and adjust them to the strictest possible level, ensuring that personal information is not shared unnecessarily. Make sure only people you know in real life or trust have access to the content you share.
3. Discuss online privacy and safety with your children
Have open conversations about why privacy is important and explain the importance of not sharing personal information online, the potential risks of interacting with strangers, and the need to think before posting or sharing anything. Hopefully by having these conversations now, you can mitigate issues arising in the future.
Check Out Mom Uncharted on the Parenting in a Tech World Podcast
Sarah recently joined Titania Jordan, Bark’s chief marketing officer, on our Parenting in a Tech World podcast. Check out the episode for an awesome conversation over on YouTube, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts.
Bark helps families manage and protect their children’s digital lives.
